Hello.  I am 42 years old and have been a single mother for most of my adult life. I am currently a Junior High teacher. I suffered from depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, feelings of worthlessness, and PTSD since childhood stemming from abuse from my father. This was all I ever knew. Once becoming a parent, I knew I had to break the cycle of abuse and began working on myself and attending therapy. Therapy never helped, so I dove into self-reflection and started healing myself the best I could. However, it never failed that when what I called “PTSD attacks” would happen, my mind always went to suicide. I knew I was not truly suicidal, but the emotions were so strong, I honestly do not know how I did not follow through with those thoughts each time. In November of 2021, I had one of the strongest “attacks” I had ever had after a trigger. I found myself calling the suicide hotline for the first time. I knew I would not be able to fight another strong “attack” like that again.           

   

         I was told about EMDR therapy a few years prior by my physician, but since traditional therapy had never worked, I had dismissed it. After this last incident, I decided to give it a try. I had everything to lose if I didn’t. I found Lizy Wiggins, LCSW through my insurance. I had 8 free therapy sessions so I knew if EMDR therapy were to work, I had to give it my all and not hold back. Lizy was FANTASTIC!  What made this therapy different for me than traditional therapy is that I didn’t feel like I was focusing on the events that happened, but instead the feelings from said events. It wasn’t your typical “sit on the couch and tell me your problems” therapy for me to relive the painful events in detail for the therapist to tell me how to feel or react. With EMDR therapy, I shared a very basic version of the painful events, then focused on the emotions that came with it.

               

        After my first EMDR session, I could tell a difference. I actually started sleeping at night. In every session, I showed improvement. After my 4th session, my family could see a difference in me. After the 8th session, I could understand what it was to feel “normal”. It has been over a year since my last session and I have had no regression. Triggering events no longer brings trigger responses. In fact, EMDR therapy has made such a difference in my life, I made the decision to go back to college and change my career. I am currently in college for my MSW degree with full intentions of obtaining my LCSW degree and focusing on trauma and EMDR therapy. I never knew life without triggers and emotional trauma until EMDR therapy. Now I can say I am truly happy for the first time in my life. I want to help others like me to know that there is happiness after trauma.